Welcome, Guest

Author Topic: Bear removal service  (Read 2038 times)

Offline Satch

  • House Bee
  • **
  • Posts: 65
  • Gender: Male
  • Grandpa and Brandon in the hives
Bear removal service
« on: January 28, 2014, 11:08:53 am »
A man in northern Minnesota woke up one morning to find a bear on his roof. He looked in the Yellow Pages, and sure enough, there was an ad for "Up North Bear Removers." He called the number listed and the bear remover said he'd be over within an hour.

The bear remover arrived, and got out of his van. He had a ladder, a baseball bat, a 12 gauge shotgun, and a mean looking, heavily scarred old pit bull.

"What are you going to do?" the homeowner asked.


"I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there, and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles, and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."


He then handed the shotgun to the homeowner. "What's the shotgun for?" the homeowner asked.


"If the bear knocks me off the roof, you shoot the dog."


Offline tefer2

  • Super Bee
  • *****
  • Posts: 2318
  • Gender: Male
Re: Bear removal service
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2014, 12:10:47 pm »
 :lau: :lau: :lau:

Offline BeeMaster2

  • Administrator
  • Universal Bee
  • *******
  • Posts: 13489
  • Gender: Male
Re: Bear removal service
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2014, 01:09:28 pm »
 :lau: :lau: :lau:

It's an oldy but a good one. I still laughed.
Jim
Democracy is 2 wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well armed lamb contesting the vote.
Ben Franklin

Offline AllenF

  • Galactic Bee
  • ******
  • Posts: 8192
  • Gender: Male
Re: Bear removal service
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2014, 03:15:19 pm »
What if it was not a boy bear?   

Offline Geoff

  • Heavenly Beekeeper
  • Field Bee
  • ********
  • Posts: 918
  • Gender: Male
Re: Bear removal service
« Reply #4 on: January 29, 2014, 06:18:01 pm »
  It would only be a boy on the roof Allan  !!!!
Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.

Offline Kamon Reynolds

  • New Bee
  • *
  • Posts: 7
  • Gender: Male
Re: Bear removal service
« Reply #5 on: January 31, 2014, 02:42:29 pm »
 :-D man I had to wipe tears away after reading this!
Kamon Reynolds.   

To bee or not to bee? What a stupid question........

 

anything