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Author Topic: An Excellent Explanation  (Read 2105 times)

Offline iddee

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An Excellent Explanation
« on: January 27, 2014, 12:35:42 pm »
The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.
And she was upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me – a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'
And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened.'
'Go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'
And the husband began – 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.
So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.
I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'
The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said,
 
Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?
 
"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"

*Shel Silverstein*

Offline BeeMaster2

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #1 on: January 27, 2014, 12:39:58 pm »
 :goodpost: :lau: :lau: :lau:
Democracy is 2 wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well armed lamb contesting the vote.
Ben Franklin

Offline edward

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2014, 05:36:09 pm »
AAAAAAAAahhhhhhhhahahhahhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa  :-D :lau: :lau: :lau:

Offline Irwin

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  • howdy all
Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #3 on: January 27, 2014, 06:55:52 pm »
 :-D :shock:
Fight organized crime!  Re-elect no one.

Offline GSF

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #4 on: January 27, 2014, 08:12:26 pm »
Ut-Oh
When the law no longer protects you from the corrupt, but protects the corrupt from you - then you know your nation is doomed.

Offline AllenF

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #5 on: January 27, 2014, 08:18:31 pm »
 :-D

Offline tefer2

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2014, 07:53:04 am »
 :-D :-D

Offline jayj200

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #7 on: September 28, 2014, 09:16:07 am »
Roaring out loud!

Offline Switchback

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Re: An Excellent Explanation
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2014, 09:54:01 pm »
 :th_thumbsupup: :th_thumbsupup: :th_thumbsupup:
"Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking." J. C. Watts

 

anything