STORY OF ELIJAH
>
>
> The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of
> Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained
> how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut a steer in pieces,
> and laid it upon the altar. And then, Elijah commanded the people of
> God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He
> had them do this four times "Now, asked the teacher, "Can anyone in
> the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the
> steer on the altar?" A little girl in the back of the room started
> waving her hand, "I know! I know!" she said, "To make the gravy!"
>
>
>
> LOT 'S WIFE
>
>
> The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot 's wife
> looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason
> interrupted,
> "My Mummy looked back once, while she was driving," he announced
> triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"
>
>
>
> GOOD SAMARITAN
>
>
> A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the
> Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead.
> She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would
> catch the drama Then, she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying
> on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?" A
> thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."
>
>
>
> DID NOAH FISH?
>
>
> A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah
> did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark ?" "No," replied David. "How
> could he, with just two worms?"
>
>
>
> HIGHER POWER
>
>
> A Sunday school teacher said to her children, " We have
> been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But,
> there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?" One
> child blurted out, "Aces!"
>
>
>
> MOSES AND THE RED SEA
>
>
> Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned
> in Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us ho God sent Moses
> behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of
> Egypt . When he got to the Red Sea , he had his army build a pontoon
> bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then, he radioed
> headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the
> bridge and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Joey, is that
> really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no,
> Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"
>
>
>
> THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
>
>
> A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize
> one of the most quoted passages in the Bible; Psalm 23. She gave the
> youngsters a month to learn the verse. Little Rick was excited about
> the task -- but, he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much
> practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that
> the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation,
>
> Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped
> up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd,
> and that's all I need to know."
>
>
>
> CHURCH SMILES
>
>
> There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old
> family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Is there
> anything
> breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments,"
> answered the lady.
>
>
> WHILE DRIVING
>
>
> While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an
> Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of
> humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed
> sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do
> not step in exhaust.
>
>
>
> A QUILT
>
>
> Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter
> what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared,
> you'll get your quilt." Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in
> the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what
> that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not
> afraid, thy comforter is coming."
>
>
> Give me a sense of humor, Lord,
> The grace to see a joke,
> To get some humor out of life,
> And pass it on to other folk.
>
Topic: Children and Church (Read 2263 times)