Beemaster's International Beekeeping Forum

MEMBER & GUEST INTERACTION SECTION => HUMOR IS A FUNNY THING => Topic started by: Sparky on March 20, 2011, 09:26:24 pm

Title: Splinters
Post by: Sparky on March 20, 2011, 09:26:24 pm
A woman from Los Angeles who was a tree hugger, a liberal Democrat, and an anti-hunter, purchased a piece of timberland near Colville , WA .
 
There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started to climb the big tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that attacked her.  In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground and got many splinters in her crotch.
 
In considerable pain, she hurried to a local ER to see a doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist, a democrat, and an anti-hunter and how she came to get all the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with great patience and then told her to go wait in the examining room and he would see if he could help her.

She sat and waited three hours before the doctor reappeared. The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?"   
   
He smiled and then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection Agency, the Forest Service, and the Bureau of Land Management before I could remove old-growth timber from a recreational area so close to a waste treatment facility. I'm sorry, but due to Obama Care they turned me down."






Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: AllenF on March 20, 2011, 09:29:07 pm
 :lau:
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: AllenF on March 20, 2011, 09:40:21 pm
I am surprised they did not fine her for disturbing that spotted owl also.    :lau:  Wife loved it also.
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: iddee on March 20, 2011, 11:00:30 pm
BEEEUUUTIFUL.  :lau: :lau:
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: hardwood on March 20, 2011, 11:08:26 pm
Spotted owl??? Don't you mean "Swamp chicken"?

 :-D
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: jmblakeney on March 21, 2011, 12:06:58 am
TThat's too funny.
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: Brian D. Bray on March 21, 2011, 06:43:44 pm
Spotted owl??? Don't you mean "Swamp chicken"?

 :-D

No, not a swamp chicken.  Unlike Florida, which is a large swamp surrounded by a sand bar, Washington is a lot of Mountains occassionally interrupted by rivers and the Salish Sea (aka Puget Sound).  Here we call them forest chicken, you get far enough back in the woods, where it's hard to see daylight and it's hard to tell the chickens from the owls (takes big eyes to see in the dark).
Title: Re: Splinters
Post by: Jerrymac on March 21, 2011, 07:25:40 pm
So that's why grandma had big eyes.