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Author Topic: You might bee a redneck beek if.....  (Read 3763 times)

Offline charlotte

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You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« on: November 25, 2009, 02:40:04 am »
-you spend more money on beekeeping supplies than your spouse
-you spell be as "bee"  most of the time, and usually don't even realize it
-you can identify most flying insects within 30 feet
-you add your own honey to cherrios, because you refuse to buy the honey "O"s
-you have ever had sticky door knobs, keys, etc and didn't think anything of it
-you actually look forward to the first beesting of the year
-you lay awake at night hoping that the weather will be good enough for a hive inspection tomorrow & then call in sick from work if it is!
-you have seen the "Bee Movie" and were disgusted by all the incorrect information
-your kids have spent hours in the garage as forced labor turning your old hand extractor
-your kids know how to light a smoker, what to put in it & how to "smoke" and you are proud
-you hear someone say "drag queen" and it makes you remember to check in on that one hive
-your idea of a fun afternoon is a lawn chair parked out by your hives
-you have stayed up until 2am on Beemaster & had to get up for work at 6am!

....You just might bee a redneck beek!!!

Let's hear everyone's ...you just might be...
LOL hope it made ya laugh!   :-D

Sleep is overrated!

Offline Bee Whisper82

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #1 on: November 25, 2009, 04:31:34 am »
The top one sounds so much like me. lol :-D

Offline lenape13

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #2 on: November 25, 2009, 07:22:13 am »
Definitely describes me.  I even sit by my hives and read.  It's the most relaxing spot I have, and I know that no one will come down to disturb me.

Offline lmehaffey

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #3 on: November 25, 2009, 08:56:55 am »
Yep....a couple of direct hits on me! No lawn chair, but I do have a hammock on the garden side of the hives; and I have actually called in sick (only once) this year, so that I could work the hives while the weather was nice!

Thanks, Charlotte, for the laughs!!   :-D
It is what it is.......except when it isn't.

Offline Bee Whisper82

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #4 on: November 25, 2009, 12:04:26 pm »
I think the "bee movie" could have been more educational.  But hollywood has to make things as they see them.  lol
   

Offline charmd2

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #5 on: November 25, 2009, 01:07:59 pm »
If you yell at your kids for making koolaid, because they are using the bees sugar..   
Charla Hinkle

Offline Bee Whisper82

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #6 on: November 25, 2009, 01:15:47 pm »
charmd2

    That's a good one.  Haven't done that yet but probably will in future hehehe!!

Offline Scadsobees

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #7 on: November 25, 2009, 01:57:19 pm »
You are setting the bar kinda high, dontcha think?  Those are all for the question of:
You might bee a beekeeper if.... :-D

But if you want:
You might bee a redneck beek if....
...you scrounge around work for old blocks to put beehives on
...you've ever dumpster dove for old 2x6's to make supers out of
...you never paint your beehives
...there's so much honey on the floor of your car that you struggle to get your feet out
...there's more than 10 bees at any given time in the back window of your car
...you have empty beehive boxes scattered around the yard
...you have a recliner outside next to your beehives
...your beekeeping gloves look like astronaut gloves from all the propolis
...there isn't any fabric left in your favorite beekeeping pants
Rick

Offline HAB

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #8 on: November 25, 2009, 02:08:19 pm »
Looks like I've got it BAD!! :bee: :bee: :bee:

Offline lenape13

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #9 on: November 25, 2009, 02:49:11 pm »



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-you spend more money on beekeeping supplies than your spouse - OF COURSE
-you spell be as "bee"  most of the time, and usually don't even realize it -  TOO BUSY DREAMING OF BEES TO WRITE
-you can identify most flying insects within 30 feet - WHO CAN'T?
-you add your own honey to cherrios, because you refuse to buy the honey "O"s - THEY MAKE IT WITH HONEY ALREADY?
-you have ever had sticky door knobs, keys, etc and didn't think anything of it - OH, THAT SOUNDS FAMILIAR
-you actually look forward to the first beesting of the year - PAIN IS GOOD
-you lay awake at night hoping that the weather will be good enough for a hive inspection tomorrow & then call in sick from work if it is! - ANY EXCUSE TO GET OUT OF WORK
-you have seen the "Bee Movie" and were disgusted by all the incorrect information - WHO NEEDS MOVIES WHEN YOU HAVE THE REAL THING
-your kids have spent hours in the garage as forced labor turning your old hand extractor - DON'T HAVE KIDS, BUT PLAN TO FORCE THE NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS INTO INDENTURED SERVTITUDE-your kids know how to light a smoker, what to put in it & how to "smoke" and you are proud - SEE PREVIOUS
-you hear someone say "drag queen" and it makes you remember to check in on that one hive - IS THERE ANY OTHER REASON TO LIVE-your idea of a fun afternoon is a lawn chair parked out by your hives - BEEN THERE, DO THAT
-you have stayed up until 2am on Beemaster & had to get up for work at 6am!  MY ONLY REASON FOR LIVING, BESIDES THE BEES

...you scrounge around work for old blocks to put beehives on - NO, PEOPLE ACTUALLY DELIVER MINE...you've ever dumpster dove for old 2x6's to make supers out of - SEE PREVIOUS
...you never paint your beehives - ALWAYS PAINT, BUT USE CHEAP MISTINTS
...there's so much honey on the floor of your car that you struggle to get your feet out - NO ROOM FOR HONEY, TOO MANY HIVES TOOLS AND SUCH
...there's more than 10 bees at any given time in the back window of your car - NO, BEES  FLY FASTER THAN MY VEHICLES DRIVE
...you have empty beehive boxes scattered around the yard  DON'T WANT TO GO THERE, SORE SPOT WITH PAM
...you have a recliner outside next to your beehives - JUST A CHAIR, BUT THANKS FOR THE IDEA!...your beekeeping gloves look like astronaut gloves from all the propolis - WHAT ARE GLOVES?
...there isn't any fabric left in your favorite beekeeping pants - DON'T WEAR SPECIAL PANTS, JUST FAVORITE OLD JEANS.
 
 

 

Offline bee-nuts

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #10 on: November 25, 2009, 02:56:46 pm »
You might be a red neck if you show up to a wedding in your only suit, a bee suit.
The moment a person forms a theory, his imagination sees in every object only the traits which favor that theory

Thomas Jefferson

Offline DaveKow

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #11 on: November 25, 2009, 08:09:29 pm »
Great post! 

Still laughing!

Offline iddee

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #12 on: November 25, 2009, 08:55:47 pm »
You might be a redneck beek if you move a hive home on the front seat of your car without covering the entrance, thus leaving the doors open at destination for a few hours until all the bees exit.
"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"

*Shel Silverstein*

Offline treebee

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #13 on: November 26, 2009, 09:41:41 am »
Your dreaming of going to church on thanksgiving day,not to pray, but because they found a hive up in the wall and it's yours for the taking...
Relax, step back, take a deep breath, the finger you save just might be your own!

Offline JP

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #14 on: November 26, 2009, 10:06:43 am »
Your wallet is covered in propolis.
You routinely have live bees inside your vehicle while driving that warrant strange looks by passerbys.
In case a fire needs to be made, you are the go to person as you always have a torch, matches or lighter with you.
There are various bee parts on the floor of your laundry room and in your vehicle.
You have more lizards and assassin bugs in your beeyards than anywhere else within a 50 mile radius.
You are known in wide circles as the beeman or beelady.
All "oops" paints are in grave danger of being snatched up immediately  whenever they hit the floor at the local H.D. or Lowes.
You use top covers as the top covers on your chicken coop nesting boxes. http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/q8Aqxc_jnzJuPJKBGvm-HQ?authkey=Gv1sRgCOGHnaGr0oe2Cw&feat=directlink


...JP
My Youtube page is titled JPthebeeman with hundreds of educational & entertaining videos.

My website JPthebeeman.com http://jpthebeeman.com

Offline USC Beeman in TN

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #15 on: November 26, 2009, 01:20:48 pm »
You are seen riding in your truck with your suit and veil on and zipped up cause you have a lot of angry girls riding with you.
Your spouse is alwast complaining about sticky doorknobs and kitchen floor.
Your patio/garage or other vacant area is always full of "bee stuff".
Bees are always flying around near your garage door or back door and you consider them pets not pests.
Head bumps are love taps.
You are always looking at the scenery while driving looking for "bee plants".
You are always looking at the scenery while driving looking for apiaries.
You are always looking at the scenery while driving hoping to spot a swarm on a branch.
You always have a crick in your neck while driving.
Pick up scrap wood beside the road because it is just what you need on your next bee project.
Your wife is jealous of "the girls" and says so!
Your wife sees "the girls" as competiton for your time and affection.
Don't mind a "it was just a little sting".

Your wife hands you the phone and says "It's someone wanting to speak to the beeman."
All scrap wood is available material for woodware.
De Colores,
Ken

Offline adgjoan

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Re: You might bee a redneck beek if.....
« Reply #16 on: November 26, 2009, 01:37:23 pm »
...........refering to a clump of bees as "the girls".
...........you buy 10 5#bags of sugar instead of 1 50# bag cuz it is cheaper that way.
...........you buy used interior doors paint them with opps paint turn them sideways for wind breaks for "the girls".

 

anything